Sunday, June 13, 2004
so the summer has started.... and everyone magically disapears.... so lessee today was church.... stump the chump.... for those of you who don't knoe... its a day when during sunday school, we bring up questions about n/ething for the pastor (the chump) to answer, and if he can't, its a dollar for the asker... so... we sat there listening to a bunch of squabble on space/time.... then my Q: "why do men have nipples?"..... i didn't stump the chump.... yeah then we went to this chinese resturant for lunch... the nine of us finnished 12 odd plates of food... OILY!... argh i swore off oily food that morning cuz i was breaking out so much... yeah in the afternoon... 3HR TUTORIN SESSION!.... paid $30... still that alota pre-alg.... i ono why.... so i might be getting insurance tomomo, then not.... return books to the CSUF library... then not... then maybe chill at borders tonite.... then not.... how about a movie with Lydia and peeps.... then not... maybe to the beach with Jing+Camille... then not.... or a movie at Olivia's... then not.... so basically... i got turned down for doing six things by my mom... today.... sighz... hmmm reading some of my stuff i wrote in my old site.... had the section called "deep thoughts"... heres an excerpt:

[Immortality, something we probably all want... kinda funny actually that we want to be able to live forever when most of our lives we tend to gripe and complain about it... biologically its almost impossible to acheive , yet people are always in the quest for the holy grail and the fountain of youth....what is so ideal about living forever? first of all, if everybody gets this "blessing," then the world will quickly over-populate, but on the otherhand, if all others cannot recieve this, then that person will see first his children die, then his grandchildren die and so on... there will be a point when life will get boring... what then? commit-suicide? won't that then become a waste of research time and money of those deceased researchers who dedicated their lives a long tyme ago? I think they should worry more about the quality, not quanty of life

"The average man does not know wht to do with his life, yet wants another one which will last forever."--Anatole France

"Without the hope for an afterlife, this life is not even worth the effort of getting dressed ing the morning."--Otto von Bismark]

yeah, i don't do that sorta thinking n/e more.... it's "impractical".... for example today, during stump the chump, as the pastor and Frankie were duking it on on whether we were "space worms" or that God was a temporal being.... i came to a realization..... a question actually.... cramped between tony and the couch, i started thinking, isn't practicality a sign of shallowness.... i've started to become extremely practical... its after i read this book titled The Mathematician's Apology by Godfrey Harold Hardy, actually for all of you pursuing a degree and pure math, read it... heres an excerpt:

"I have never done anything "useful." No discovery of mine has made, or is likely to make, directly or indirectly, for good or ill, the least difference to the amenity of the world. I have helped to train other mathematicians, but mathematicians of the same kind as myself, and their work has been, so far at any rate as I have helped them to it, as useless as my own. Judged by all practical standards, the value of my mathematical life is nil; and outside mathematics it is trivial anyhow. I have just one chance for escaping a verdict of complete triviality, that I may be judged to have created something worth creating. And that I have created something is undeniable: the question is about its value."

so basically i wanted not to have to regret it and write an apology for myself... (btw.. this book is widely read and is is many many languages... sighz.... so after becoming practical... i started to wonder if i was shallow... cuz i ono they seem to follow, i type like dis cuz its practical, and i type faster... but really, its fobby and aZn..... so is it shallow... i seem to thnk so.... so i don't knoe... yeah.... had dinner with a former teacher and the apology came up in conversation...i guess it's one of those pinnicle-on-top-of-the-hill-epiphanies sorta thing... can't believe... so my question is ... does ur future help the human race... cuz mine will... and its not gonna be in pure math... i think.... well its been quite a long blog, i think i will end here... argh i lost that quote about living a second time.... w/e.... nite...